#AutismJourney

  • Blog, schedules

    Why I Started Educating Jacob: Support and Resources for Autism Families

    Educating Jacob: Support and Resources for Autism Families

    birthday-reflections-on-autism-blog-post@educatingjacob
    💙 To the parent feeling overwhelmed, exhausted, and lost—I see you.

    🎉 Today is a big milestone for me—my 60th birthday! 🎂 As I reflect on my journey, I feel called to share my story and why I started Educating Jacob. Being vulnerable isn’t always easy, but if my experiences can help even one struggling parent, then it’s worth it. Because I’ve been there—I’ve lived that fear, uncertainty, and overwhelming sense of not knowing what to do when my son Jacob was first diagnosed with autism. 💙 Visual Schedule Hacks for autism parents, Starting 2025 CALM!

    The Early Years: Fear, Confusion, and the Search for Answers 🧩

    Fear-and-Confusion-took-over-autism-diagnosis
    #ParentingWithPurpose #AutismSupportCommunity #AutismLife

    When we first received Jacob’s diagnosis, I was terrified. I had no idea how to help him. He would have meltdowns in public, struggle with changes, and his speech wasn’t developing the way his older brother Nicholas’s had. 😞

    I received hugs and kisses, but no “Mama.” The milestones I had celebrated so naturally with my first child weren’t happening. I started pushing doctors for answers, but I kept hearing:

    ❌ “Boys develop speech later than girls.” ❌ “He seems to be meeting his other milestones.”

    But deep down, I knew something was different. And so began the long waitlists, endless evaluations, and finally—the autism diagnosis.

    Now, I had an answer. But I still had no clue how to help my child. 🤷‍♀️ 4 Things I Wish I Would Have Known After Getting the Autism Diagnosis

    A Lack of Guidance, a Desire to Learn, and an Unexpected Truth 📚

    At the time, I had no mentors to guide me. I had wonderful women in my life—my mom, aunts, and friends—but none of them had experience raising a child with autism. There was no one to say, “Try this. This worked for my child.” I felt alone, desperate for support and resources for autism families.

    So, I made a big decision: ✅ I went back to school and earned a graduate degree in special education.

    I thought it would give me all the answers I needed to help Jacob. But here’s the truth:

    💸 Save your money.

    A degree didn’t give me the magic solution—because autism is a spectrum. No textbook could tell me exactly what would work for Jacob. I learned useful tools, but when it came to real life, it was still trial and error.

    Finding What Works: The Birth of Educating Jacob 🌱

    Over time, I started figuring out what worked—not just for Jacob, but for our family as a whole. I learned how to reduce anxiety, minimize meltdowns, and create a home environment that was calm instead of chaotic. 🏡✨

    Now, at 27 years old, Jacob’s life looks very different than it did back then. We still have challenges, but now we have a toolkit, a structure, and a way of doing things that brings peace instead of frustration.

    This is why I started Educating Jacob.

    I never want another parent to feel as lost, helpless, or alone as I did. If I can take everything I’ve learned—from raising Jacob, teaching other children with autism, and even homeschooling my own son—and pass that knowledge on, then I know I’m making a difference.

    My Mission: Helping Families Thrive, Not Just Survive 💙

    Join-Autism-Thrive-Tribe
    Raising a child with autism is challenging—but you don’t have to do it alone.

    I want to be the mentor I never had—for parents who are still struggling, still looking for support and resources for autism families, still searching for answers and guidance in the chaos of autism parenting.

    I want to tell parents: ✨ It gets better. ✨ You can do this. ✨ You don’t have to figure it out alone.

    And most importantly, I want to help families find what works. Because when life starts going wrong and nothing seems to be working, we have two choices:

    1️⃣ Keep doing the same thing and hope for different results. 2️⃣ Try something new.

    And trying something new is what led me to create the CALM Framework—the foundation of Educating Jacob: ✔ C: Consistent Action Forward ✔ A: Always Celebrate Wins ✔ L: Learning to Create Schedules ✔ M: Mindset

    These four pillars help guide families toward a life that is structured, peaceful, and full of hope. 🌟

    The Autism Thrive Tribe: A Community of Support 🤝

    One of the best things to come from this journey has been creating a community. I started the Autism Thrive Tribe to bring parents together—to support one another, share wins and struggles, and learn from each other’s experiences.

    If you’re an autism parent or a teacher trying to support a child with autism, I invite you to join us. Because no one should have to figure this out alone. 💙

    📢 Join here: [AUTISM THRIVE TRIBE]

    A Birthday Reflection: Gratitude, Hope, and Looking Ahead 🎂

    Today, as I turn 60, I look back on the years of struggle, learning, and growth—and I feel grateful. 🙏

    💙 Grateful for my son, for the lessons he’s taught me, and for the opportunity to share those lessons with others. 💙 Grateful that our home is no longer filled with anxiety and constant meltdowns—but instead, with structure, peace, and love. 💙 Grateful that I have the chance to help other families find that same hope.

    I won’t pretend that every day is easy. Autism parenting is a journey, and it comes with ups and downs. But I can tell you this—

    ✅ It is possible to find joy again. ✅ It is possible to go from surviving to thriving. ✅ And if you’re feeling lost right now, you’re not alone.

    I see you. I’ve been you. And I’m here to help. 💙

    Let’s Connect! 🌍

    If my story resonates with you, I’d love for you to join me: 👉 Join the Autism Thrive Tribe – A supportive group for parents navigating autism. 👉 Follow Educating Jacob – For tips, encouragement, and practical strategies. 👉 Explore the CALM Frameworks – Learn how to create a structured, peaceful life for your child and your family.

    On this special birthday, my wish is to bless someone else with what I’ve learned. Because together, we can make this journey so much easier. 💙

    With love and gratitude,
    Melissa Garcia
    Founder, Educating Jacob

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  • Blog, schedules

    You Have to Stop Freaking Out! Mindset for Autism Parenting.

    Mindset-for-Autism-Parenting
    Routine things can be difficult for children with autism, Let’s help them!

    Mindset for Autism Parenting

     

    When you first receive an autism diagnosis, it’s completely natural to feel a rush of emotions—shock, fear, maybe even grief. You have to move beyond the fear and get a mindset for autism parenting. We all envision what family life will look like, filled with vacations, holidays, and weekend adventures. Suddenly, with the diagnosis, those dreams might feel out of reach, and it’s easy to feel like everything you’d imagined has shifted.

     

    But here’s the truth: while it’s okay to feel those emotions initially, staying in a place of fear and worry only holds us back. As parents, we need a plan, not just for our children but also for ourselves. When we’re overwhelmed by worry, we can’t move forward and be the parents our kids need us to be. 

    In this post, I’ll share the mindset shift that helped me step away from overwhelm and back into a place of confidence and control. With the right mindset, we can embrace life on Autism Island with calm, purpose, and strength, making space for family joy—on our terms. https://www.desiringgod.org/articles/not-wired-for-this-world

    You Have to Stop Freaking Out!

    When we first hear the word “autism” in connection with our child, it can feel like everything we hoped for as a family is suddenly uncertain. That moment is overwhelming. I remember the fear and grief vividly. What would happen to the vacations, holiday traditions, sports games, and concerts I’d always imagined we’d share as a family? The future I’d dreamed of for Jacob suddenly seemed out of reach.

    It’s okay to feel these things. You’re not alone in this experience. The key is not to stay stuck in fear. We don’t want to lose the confidence and joy that first came with parenting. We’re here to love, guide, and teach our children, just as Proverbs 20:11 reminds us: “Even a child makes himself known by his acts, by whether his conduct is pure and upright.” With the right mindset, you can move forward confidently, finding purpose in each day, and building a home filled with peace, calm, and joy.

    Mindset: Start with CALM Action

    For me, shifting my mindset began with taking CALM action forward. I realized that I was the best person to help Jacob, even though I had no experience with autism. You don’t need a degree to make a positive difference in your child’s life, but you do need the right mindset and practical tools. You are qualified and capable; you know your child better than anyone else.

    When Jacob was young, I had no idea what to look for or where to start. His speech was delayed, and we kept hearing, “He’ll talk when he’s ready.” Looking back, I can see the signs—the hand-flapping, sensory excitement—but at the time, I had no guidance. It wasn’t until he was four that we got the diagnosis, and by then, I felt like so much time had been lost.

    Proverbs-20:11_Educating-Jacob
    Let’s use our Visual Schedules to guide Actions!

    Finding Support and Setting Goals

    After Jacob’s diagnosis, I was consumed with research and self-doubt. I didn’t have anyone to mentor me, and I felt like a horrible mom, overwhelmed and unsure. Over time, with the support of friends, family, and my own growing strength, I started to find my footing. My best friend gave me the confidence to keep going when she told me, “You’re doing everything you can, and you’re going to figure this out.” We were both homeschooling at this point in the journey.

    Finding someone who’s been where you are can be incredibly helpful. Having a mentor or a supportive community can keep you moving forward. And remember: confidence starts with a single step. Even small victories build momentum and hope.

    Journaling-helps-to-look-back-on-past-struggles-and-victories
    Celebrate all Wins! Journal so you can look back and see progress.

    The Power of Visual Schedules for Calm and Communication

    Looking back, I can see how learning to make activities and visual schedules for Jacob transformed our lives. At the time, I didn’t understand how this would help—he wasn’t even speaking! But structured routines were exactly what he needed to reduce anxiety and meltdowns, and they helped me communicate without words. 4 Things I Wish I Would Have Known After Getting the Autism Diagnosis

    Visual schedules became our lifeline. They allowed Jacob to see his day at a glance, knowing what was coming next without needing long explanations. This structure helped him feel safe and reduced his need for meltdowns as a way to control his world. The calm it brought was a gift, and it even helped ease my own anxiety.

    Building Routines and Confidence for Your Child (and You!)

    Children with autism thrive on structure and routine. A well-laid-out day allows them to understand their world without constant fear of the unknown. Visual schedules and activities give them something predictable to rely on, reducing anxiety and providing calm.

    When I began creating visual schedules, I kept it simple, starting with things Jacob was already familiar with, like brushing his teeth or choosing his clothes. Every small success became a building block for confidence, and I celebrated each win. It’s a powerful feeling to watch your child become more independent, even with small steps. Over time, this helped both of us approach each day with more ease.

    Tips for building routines with confidence:

    • Start small and keep it simple – Begin with familiar tasks and gradually build on them.
    • Celebrate wins – Acknowledge every success, no matter how small, to build confidence.
    • Adjust as needed – Be flexible; what works one day might need a tweak the next.
    Creating a Home Filled with Calm, Joy, and Structure

    Our journey taught me that achieving calm doesn’t require big, dramatic changes. Instead, small actions—visual schedules, routines, and learning to communicate in non-verbal ways—had the biggest impact. I even taught Jacob a bit of sign language, paired with his favorite songs, which helped him express himself without feeling overwhelmed by words. Over time, our home became a place of calm and joy, where everyone could feel understood and safe. Stop engaging in power struggles! Use redirection for your autistic child.

    Remember: You don’t have to go through this journey alone. There are others who’ve walked this path and can offer support and encouragement. Visual schedules and routines may seem small, but they are game-changers. They help reduce stress, create calm, and provide clarity for you and your child.

    Tips to Keep Moving Forward with Confidence
    1. Trust Your Instincts – You know your child best. Use this knowledge to create routines and strategies that work specifically for them.
    2. Celebrate Every Small Step – Even a small win is a huge step in the right direction. Acknowledge each success to build momentum.
    3. Find a Support System – Seek out others who understand the autism journey. Whether it’s a friend, family member, or online community, support makes all the difference.
    4. Document Your Journey – Journaling, even if only on difficult days, can help you see how far you’ve come. When things feel challenging, look back at past entries and recognize the growth.
    5. Stay Flexible and Open – Every child is unique. If something doesn’t work, pivot and try again. Trust that you’ll find a rhythm that suits both you and your child.
    🧐 Struggling with daily routines and meltdowns?
    🌟 As an autism parent coach, I help you transform chaos into calm by creating strategies that work for your family. 🌟

    📅 Schedule a discovery call
    👉🏼 Visit my contact page to get started: https://educatingjacob.com/contact/

    #autismcoach #autismparentcoaching #autismandepilepsy #autismfamily💙#autismmom😎 #autismboymom😎 #autismchallenges🧩 #AutismParenting #DoctorVisitSuccess #EducatingJacob #AutismSupport #CalmParenting#askmelissa

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  • Blog, schedules

    4 Things I Wish I Would Have Known After Getting the Autism Diagnosis

    4-Things-I-Wish-I-Would-Have-Known-After-Getting-the-Autism-Diagnosis
    We all need help and support on this autism journey.

    Autism Diagnosis Tips for Parents

    When I first heard the words “autism diagnosis” for Jacob, my world spun into chaos. I felt like I was fumbling through a fog, unsure of what to do or where to turn. I’m here to share autism diagnosis tips for parents. If you’re reading this, you’re likely on a similar journey, and I want to share four crucial lessons I’ve learned along the way. These strategies have been a beacon of hope and structure for our family, and I hope they can guide you too.

    Autism Tips for Parents Visual Schedules

    What I Wish I Knew:
    Visual schedules are a game-changer for children with autism. This is my big tip for parents getting an autism diagnosis.They provide structure and predictability, helping your child understand what to expect and when.📅 

    Why It’s Important:

    – Reduces Anxiety: Knowing what comes next helps your child feel more secure. For Jacob, having a clear visual schedule transformed his daily experience from chaos to calm. 🧘‍♂️

    – Improves Transition: Visual schedules make it easier for your child to move from one activity to another without meltdowns. Transitions became smoother for Jacob once we implemented this strategy. 🚦

    – Encourages Independence: Your child can learn to follow routines independently. Jacob learned to manage his own day, which boosted his confidence and autonomy. 🏆

    How to Implement:

    – Use images, symbols, or photos to create a daily schedule.
    – Keep it simple and consistent, especially at the beginning.
    – Gradually introduce more complex tasks as your child becomes comfortable.

    Tip: Start with a morning routine and build from there. Consistency is key!

     

    Build a Strong Support Network 👪

    What I Wish I Knew:
    You’re not in this alone! My next autism diagnosis tip for parents! Building a support network can make a huge difference for you and your child.

    Why It’s Important:

    – Emotional Support: Connect with other parents who understand your journey. This sense of community can be incredibly comforting. 🤝

    – Resource Sharing: Learn from others’ experiences and get advice on therapies and services. Other parents often have insights and tips that can be invaluable. 💡

    – Community Connection: Create a sense of belonging for your child and family. Having a support network helps everyone feel less isolated. 🌍

    How to Implement:

    – Join local and online autism support groups.
    – Connect with professionals who specialize in autism.
    – Reach out to family and friends for support.

    Tip: Don’t hesitate to ask for help when you need it. Support is a powerful tool!

     

    Prioritize Sensory-Friendly Environments 🧩

    What I Wish I Knew:
    Next, on my list of autism diagnosis tips for parents that battle sensory issues. Children with autism often have unique sensory needs. Creating a sensory-friendly environment can enhance your child’s comfort and ability to learn.

    Why It’s Important:

    – Enhances Focus: Reduces sensory overload, allowing your child to concentrate better. This was crucial for Jacob, who could become overwhelmed by certain stimuli. 🎯

    – Promotes Calmness: A calming environment helps regulate emotions and behavior. A peaceful setting can prevent or de-escalate potential meltdowns. 🌿

    – Supports Development: Sensory-friendly spaces can aid in learning and growth. Jacob thrived in an environment tailored to his sensory needs. 🌱

    How to Implement:

    – Identify your child’s sensory triggers and preferences.
    – Adjust lighting, noise, and textures in your home to suit your child’s needs.
    – Create a designated calm-down area with sensory tools and toys.

    Tip: A simple sensory bin or fidget toy can work wonders for self-regulation!

     

    Learn and Adapt with Your Child 📚
    Finding-your-rhythm-after-an-autism-diagnosis-is-possible
    Consistency and confidence will come with action! Always learning.

    What I Wish I Knew:
    Every child with autism is unique, and so is their journey. Be prepared to learn and adapt as you discover what works best for your child. Read  👉🏼Autism Diagnosis: My Home Was in Chaos and I Felt Like a Terrible Mom!

    Why It’s Important:

    – Individualized Learning: No one-size-fits-all approach exists. Each child’s needs and strengths are different. Jacob taught us that flexibility and adaptation were key. 🔍

    – Continuous Growth: Your child will change and grow, and your strategies should evolve too. Stay open to new methods and insights. 🌈

    – Parental Empowerment: As you learn alongside your child, you’ll become more empowered and confident in your parenting skills. 💪

    How to Implement:

    – Stay informed about autism research and therapies.
    – Be open to trying new strategies and tools.
    – Embrace the journey and celebrate the unique qualities of your child.

    Tip: Keep a journal to track your child’s progress and reflect on your own growth as a parent. Celebrate your wins too!

     

    Applying the CALM Framework to Our Journey

    When Jacob was diagnosed, we developed our CALM framework to guide us through the challenges:

    1. Consistent Action Forward (C)
    – Build routines and stick to them. Consistency helps create a stable environment that reduces anxiety.

    2. Always Celebrate Wins (A)
    – Acknowledge every success, no matter how small. Celebrating milestones fosters a positive atmosphere.

    3. Learning to Create Schedules (L)
    – Use visual schedules to bring peace and order. They help your child understand their day and reduce stress.

    4. Mindset Matters (M)
    – Embrace the journey with a positive outlook. Remember, you are your child’s greatest advocate. How does mindset change things when raising a child with autism? 🧩

    CALM-frameworks-for-educatingjacob.com
    CALM over Chaos and frustration!
    Final Thoughts 🌟

    Last, on my list of autism diagnosis tips for parents Raising a child with autism is a journey filled with challenges and triumphs. By applying the CALM framework—Consistent Action, Always Celebrate Wins, Learning to Create Schedules, and Mindset—you can create a nurturing environment where your child can thrive. Remember, you’re not alone in this journey. Together, we can build a brighter future for our children. 💙 Here’s a blog post about an adult diagnosis: https://www.duchessofneverland.com/home/autism-diagnosis

    Feel free to share your thoughts and experiences in the comments below. Let’s support each other on this journey! 📢💬 Want more info, download the ebook! https://educatingjacob.myflodesk.com/tfgvkumbkg

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  • Blog, schedules

    Autism Diagnosis: My Home Was in Chaos and I Felt Like a Terrible Mom!

    My Home Was in Chaos

    Before Jacob’s autism diagnosis, doctors reassured us with comments like, “He’s meeting his other developmental milestones” and “Boys talk later than girls sometimes.” Jacob was 2 years old and still had no language. After a mom fit in the doctor’s office, they finally put in a referral for speech therapy. It took almost 6 months to get into the speech therapist covered by our insurance. After the first visit, she told me to get him tested and into preschool.

    autism mom worry, When I'm afraid, Psalm 56:3
    1 Corinthians 3:11 “For no one can lay a foundation other than that which is laid, which is Jesus Christ”

     

    Autism Diagnosis: The Fear 😔

    Researching autism and therapies!
    Researching and going to approved therapies for autism!

    My confidence as a mom plummeted, and the fear was real. My first son was perfect, with all the typical milestones. It took another 4-6 months to get Jacob tested for autism through the schools and Teacch, who were wonderful and conducted thorough evaluations over several days. The meltdowns at the testing sites stripped the rest of my confidence. I felt like I was being judged by everyone when they happened. I felt clueless.

    Navigating the Early Stages 🍼

    Meanwhile, I learned from watching the speech therapist. Jacob was not comfortable with anyone outside the family. No therapies or testing went well. Jacob was obviously upset to be somewhere other than home. He was a fussy eater, didn’t sleep well at night, frequently had ear infections, then tubes in his ears, and frequent bowel issues. Initially, we blamed the ear infections and eventually had his hearing checked.

    Our home was full of worry by this time. We knew something wasn’t right but didn’t know what or how long it would take to get a handle on it. Jacob now had full-on meltdowns as we tried to get speech therapy and more engagement with him.

    The Diagnosis and Initial Steps 🏫

    Jacob was very independent, probably because he didn’t have language to ask us for things. When Jacob started preschool, he did not engage with the other kids and only with the adults when he needed something. The official diagnosis came in, and Jacob was placed into a self-contained autism room. It was necessary because he had no success in the other room, and the teacher had no clue what to do with him. In the autism self-contained room, the teacher started him on a visual schedule from day one. But, there was only a limited time each child could have, and Jacob was really behind, so we started considering homeschooling.

    The Power of Visual Schedules 📅

    Today's Schedule, Jacob-educatingjacob.com
    Jacob’s earlier schedules could not contain more than 1 item per line.

    From that point on, we used visual schedules at home. I started going to the Teacch office, and they helped me build activities that Jacob could understand without needing language. Now, I can build schedules with work (activities) he needs to do to be a member of the family. He discovered he could learn, do work like the rest of the family, and have activities before movies, trains, toys, etc. Can a schedule help hyperactivity in toddlers? #Autism Challenges🧩

    Finding Our Rhythm 🎬

    It took years to figure things out, and Jacob is still not talking, but we started using movie quotes from movies he liked to see him light up. We were speaking his language. We also started using sign language, which really helped Jacob. Using his hands and the visual of watching someone complete a sign allowed Jacob’s brain to locate the word he wanted to say. He learned basic signs that we used while watching a show called Signing Time. 3 ways American Sign Language helped my son with autism speak in short sentences?

    Gaining Control and Peace 🧘‍♂️

    We have more confidence as parents and peace in the home now. Jacob has a schedule, he can communicate some of his wants and needs, he’s doing schoolwork and chores, and we also started homeschooling him and his brother.

    His brother, Nicholas, is now in graduate school and Jacob is grown and living at home with us today. He still does schoolwork, chores and shopping with us and he is able to do so with less anxiety using schedules. His day is chaotic and anxious without schedules. We are all much happier now.

    A Message to Other Autism Parents 💪

    To all the parents out there feeling the weight of an autism diagnosis and the chaos that follows, know that you are not alone. It’s a journey filled with ups and downs, but with patience, love, and the right strategies, you can create a structured and peaceful environment for your child. Remember, it’s okay to have off days. Just keep moving forward, one step at a time. You’ve got this! 💖

    Feel free to share your thoughts and experiences in the comments below. Want more information? Sign up for my ebook: https://educatingjacob.myflodesk.com/tfgvkumbkg Let’s support each other on this journey! 📢💬

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