#AutismParenting

  • How Jacob’s Autism Makes Birthday Celebrations Unique on Autism Island.

    Happy Birthday! Autism and Birthdays
    Birthdays may look a little different on Autism Island!

    Autism And Birthday Celebrations

    Life on Autism Island is a journey filled with its own set of adventures and challenges, even if it’s birthday celebrations! If you’ve been following my blog on Educating Jacob, you already know that living on Autism Island means embracing a world where every experience is as unique as the individuals who live here. Birthdays, in particular, stand out as special occasions that are celebrated differently from the mainstream yet are filled with love, laughter, and a touch of unpredictability. Here’s another post you can check out: https://hiblogimdad.com/2018/03/19/does-he-know-its-his-birthday/

    Autism Birthday and Superman!
    Jacob loves Superman!

    A Unique Autism Birthday Celebration 🎉

    Jacob’s birthdays are a testament to how our family has adapted to the beautiful complexities of autism. Like any other child, Jacob eagerly anticipates his birthday. He loves the idea of having a party, but, as many autism parents can relate, traditional celebrations often don’t fit the mold.

    For instance, singing “Happy Birthday” is a ritual that comes with its own set of challenges. 🎶 While the song brings joy to many, for Jacob, it triggers a sensory overload that has him plugging his ears and pacing until it’s over. Despite this, he often wears a smile that warms my heart. 😊 It’s a reminder that he understands the specialness of the moment, even if he experiences it differently. 3 Ways Jacob’s Monthly Calendar and Daily Schedule Work on Autism Island!

    Navigating Sensory Issues 🌟

    Birthday parties often come with sensory challenges for children on the autism spectrum. Here’s how we address some of these issues to ensure Jacob has a joyful experience:

    1. Noise Sensitivity 🎵:
      • Problem: Loud noises like singing, clapping, or party horns can be overwhelming.
      • Solution: We use noise-canceling headphones to help Jacob manage the noise levels. Additionally, we keep the volume low and opt for soft music or nature sounds in the background.
    2. Visual Overstimulation 🎈:
      • Problem: Bright lights and busy decorations can be too much for Jacob.
      • Solution: We choose calming color schemes and avoid flashing lights. Gentle, natural lighting or soft fairy lights work wonders in creating a peaceful ambiance.
    3. Tactile Sensitivities 🎂:
      • Problem: Certain textures in food or decorations might be uncomfortable.
      • Solution: We involve Jacob in choosing party items. From the texture of the cake icing to the fabric of his clothes, we ensure everything feels just right for him.
    4. Unpredictable Situations ⏰:
      • Problem: Surprises or unexpected changes can be unsettling.
      • Solution: We prepare a visual schedule or a simple checklist so Jacob knows what to expect throughout the day. Having a “quiet corner” where he can retreat if things get overwhelming is also a great strategy.

    The Magic of a “Surprise Birthday” 🎁

    Jacob once told me he wanted a “surprise birthday.” It’s these little requests that showcase his unique perspective and make every celebration an adventure. Jacob often draws inspiration from movies or cartoons, which means every year brings a new theme that reflects his current interests.

    One year, it might be a superhero-themed celebration inspired by his favorite animated movie. 🦸‍♂️ The next, it might be something as whimsical as a cartoon character who’s captured his heart. 🦄 These themes make each birthday feel like a new chapter in our Autism Island adventure.

    Evolving Traditions 🥳

    When Jacob was younger, planning birthday parties was a bit easier. We invited close friends and family, and it felt more like a traditional celebration. However, as he’s grown older, the dynamics have changed. Those childhood friends who once joined our celebrations have moved on to lead their adult lives, and Jacob’s social circle has shifted.

    But this doesn’t stop us from creating memorable birthday and other celebrations. We’ve learned to adapt and make the most of what we have. Family dinners, decorations, and special movie nights have become our go-to traditions. 🍿 It’s about creating an environment that Jacob loves and feels comfortable in, which is often a quieter, more intimate gathering. 

    Life on Autism Island 🌍

    Living on Autism Island can sometimes feel isolating. It’s not just about being different from the rest of the world; it’s about embracing those differences and making them work for us. But please don’t mistake this for a sob story. We’re not on the brink of despair; rather, we’re thriving. Autism Awareness happened in April? Jacob’s Autism Education and schedule. 

    Transforming-Chaos-into-Calm-with-Autism-Awareness
    Chaos to CALM!

    Want more? Download our free guide: https://educatingjacob.myflodesk.com/tfgvkumbkg

     

    Read More

  • 4 Things I Wish I Would Have Known After Getting the Autism Diagnosis

    4-Things-I-Wish-I-Would-Have-Known-After-Getting-the-Autism-Diagnosis
    We all need help and support on this autism journey.

    Autism Diagnosis Tips for Parents

    When I first heard the words “autism diagnosis” for Jacob, my world spun into chaos. I felt like I was fumbling through a fog, unsure of what to do or where to turn. I’m here to share autism diagnosis tips for parents. If you’re reading this, you’re likely on a similar journey, and I want to share four crucial lessons I’ve learned along the way. These strategies have been a beacon of hope and structure for our family, and I hope they can guide you too.

    Autism Tips for Parents Visual Schedules

    What I Wish I Knew:
    Visual schedules are a game-changer for children with autism. This is my big tip for parents getting an autism diagnosis.They provide structure and predictability, helping your child understand what to expect and when.📅 

    Why It’s Important:

    – Reduces Anxiety: Knowing what comes next helps your child feel more secure. For Jacob, having a clear visual schedule transformed his daily experience from chaos to calm. 🧘‍♂️

    – Improves Transition: Visual schedules make it easier for your child to move from one activity to another without meltdowns. Transitions became smoother for Jacob once we implemented this strategy. 🚦

    – Encourages Independence: Your child can learn to follow routines independently. Jacob learned to manage his own day, which boosted his confidence and autonomy. 🏆

    How to Implement:

    – Use images, symbols, or photos to create a daily schedule.
    – Keep it simple and consistent, especially at the beginning.
    – Gradually introduce more complex tasks as your child becomes comfortable.

    Tip: Start with a morning routine and build from there. Consistency is key!

     

    Build a Strong Support Network 👪

    What I Wish I Knew:
    You’re not in this alone! My next autism diagnosis tip for parents! Building a support network can make a huge difference for you and your child.

    Why It’s Important:

    – Emotional Support: Connect with other parents who understand your journey. This sense of community can be incredibly comforting. 🤝

    – Resource Sharing: Learn from others’ experiences and get advice on therapies and services. Other parents often have insights and tips that can be invaluable. 💡

    – Community Connection: Create a sense of belonging for your child and family. Having a support network helps everyone feel less isolated. 🌍

    How to Implement:

    – Join local and online autism support groups.
    – Connect with professionals who specialize in autism.
    – Reach out to family and friends for support.

    Tip: Don’t hesitate to ask for help when you need it. Support is a powerful tool!

     

    Prioritize Sensory-Friendly Environments 🧩

    What I Wish I Knew:
    Next, on my list of autism diagnosis tips for parents that battle sensory issues. Children with autism often have unique sensory needs. Creating a sensory-friendly environment can enhance your child’s comfort and ability to learn.

    Why It’s Important:

    – Enhances Focus: Reduces sensory overload, allowing your child to concentrate better. This was crucial for Jacob, who could become overwhelmed by certain stimuli. 🎯

    – Promotes Calmness: A calming environment helps regulate emotions and behavior. A peaceful setting can prevent or de-escalate potential meltdowns. 🌿

    – Supports Development: Sensory-friendly spaces can aid in learning and growth. Jacob thrived in an environment tailored to his sensory needs. 🌱

    How to Implement:

    – Identify your child’s sensory triggers and preferences.
    – Adjust lighting, noise, and textures in your home to suit your child’s needs.
    – Create a designated calm-down area with sensory tools and toys.

    Tip: A simple sensory bin or fidget toy can work wonders for self-regulation!

     

    Learn and Adapt with Your Child 📚
    Finding-your-rhythm-after-an-autism-diagnosis-is-possible
    Consistency and confidence will come with action! Always learning.

    What I Wish I Knew:
    Every child with autism is unique, and so is their journey. Be prepared to learn and adapt as you discover what works best for your child. Read  👉🏼Autism Diagnosis: My Home Was in Chaos and I Felt Like a Terrible Mom!

    Why It’s Important:

    – Individualized Learning: No one-size-fits-all approach exists. Each child’s needs and strengths are different. Jacob taught us that flexibility and adaptation were key. 🔍

    – Continuous Growth: Your child will change and grow, and your strategies should evolve too. Stay open to new methods and insights. 🌈

    – Parental Empowerment: As you learn alongside your child, you’ll become more empowered and confident in your parenting skills. 💪

    How to Implement:

    – Stay informed about autism research and therapies.
    – Be open to trying new strategies and tools.
    – Embrace the journey and celebrate the unique qualities of your child.

    Tip: Keep a journal to track your child’s progress and reflect on your own growth as a parent. Celebrate your wins too!

     

    Applying the CALM Framework to Our Journey

    When Jacob was diagnosed, we developed our CALM framework to guide us through the challenges:

    1. Consistent Action Forward (C)
    – Build routines and stick to them. Consistency helps create a stable environment that reduces anxiety.

    2. Always Celebrate Wins (A)
    – Acknowledge every success, no matter how small. Celebrating milestones fosters a positive atmosphere.

    3. Learning to Create Schedules (L)
    – Use visual schedules to bring peace and order. They help your child understand their day and reduce stress.

    4. Mindset Matters (M)
    – Embrace the journey with a positive outlook. Remember, you are your child’s greatest advocate. How does mindset change things when raising a child with autism? 🧩

    CALM-frameworks-for-educatingjacob.com
    CALM over Chaos and frustration!
    Final Thoughts 🌟

    Last, on my list of autism diagnosis tips for parents Raising a child with autism is a journey filled with challenges and triumphs. By applying the CALM framework—Consistent Action, Always Celebrate Wins, Learning to Create Schedules, and Mindset—you can create a nurturing environment where your child can thrive. Remember, you’re not alone in this journey. Together, we can build a brighter future for our children. 💙 Here’s a blog post about an adult diagnosis: https://www.duchessofneverland.com/home/autism-diagnosis

    Feel free to share your thoughts and experiences in the comments below. Let’s support each other on this journey! 📢💬 Want more info, download the ebook! https://educatingjacob.myflodesk.com/tfgvkumbkg

    Read More

  • Why teach chores for children with autism, how a schedule helps!

    5 Chores to teach your child with autism
    5 Chores you can teach even a young child.

    Click here to get a link to the printable list with why you should and how!

     Chores For Children With Autism

    As parents, we want to raise responsible and independent children who can take care of themselves and contribute to their households. When you have a child with autism, sometimes you just don’t know where to start, and fear takes over. “My child isn’t even verbal; don’t tell me to teach chores, I mean really!” 😅

    Once I realized Jacob needed this as much or more than other children, I got to work. We can teach our kids how to do household chores. It’s really not that hard—no special education degree required! Just a simple schedule and consistency. 📅✅

    Parents need a break too!

    Even if it’s going to the grocery store alone!

    Not only does this help to lighten the load for busy parents, but it also teaches children valuable life skills that will serve them well into adulthood. In this blog post, we’ll explore the top five chores that every child should learn how to do, and why.

    From doing laundry to washing dishes, these tasks may seem mundane, but they are crucial for building responsibility, self-sufficiency, and a strong work ethic in children. So, let’s dive in and discover the benefits of teaching kids how to help out around the house. 🧺🍽️✨

    Age-Appropriate Chores for Children with Autism

    It’s important to assign age-appropriate chores to children. Younger children can start with simple tasks such as putting away toys, making their bed, or helping to set the table. These tasks can all be included on a visual schedule. 📅 It’s essential for the child to know what’s expected and when they are finished! ✅

    As children get older, they can take on more responsibility, such as doing laundry, washing dishes, and cleaning their room. 🧺🍽️ Jacob has all of these on his daily schedule now that he is older and not reporting to a job.

    Chores Based on Age

    Assigning chores for children with autism based on age not only ensures that the task is appropriate for their physical and mental capabilities, but it also helps to build their confidence and sense of independence. As they complete these tasks, they will feel a sense of accomplishment and pride in their ability to contribute to the household. 🌟

    Don’t be afraid to assign tasks that may be difficult at first but can be mastered with practice and patience. When Jacob is learning something new, I model the task and remain patient. It should not be an independent task until they are able to complete it without looking to you for help. 🧹

    Remember, even superheroes need a bit of training before they can save the day! 🦸‍♂️🦸‍♀️ With consistency and encouragement, chores for children with autism can become a valuable part of their routine, promoting both independence and a strong work ethic.

    Responsibility and Independence

    One of the most important benefits of teaching children chores is that it teaches them responsibility and independence. When children are assigned chores, they learn that they are responsible for completing the task and that their actions have consequences. Jacob knows if he has a good week, he is allowed to order from Amazon or eBay on Friday. 📦

    As they complete these tasks, they also learn valuable time management skills and how to prioritize their responsibilities. This helps to build a sense of independence and self-sufficiency, which is crucial for their development as they grow older. ⏰

    Additionally, chores teach children the importance of taking care of their belongings and their environment. This not only helps to keep the house clean and organized, but also teaches children the value of respecting their surroundings. 🧹✨

    Chores Teach Valuable Life Skills

    Another benefit of teaching children chores is that it teaches them valuable life skills that will serve them well into adulthood. For example, doing laundry teaches children how to sort and wash clothes, as well as how to operate a washing machine and dryer. 🧺

    Washing dishes teaches children how to clean and sanitize dishes properly, as well as how to handle fragile items. 🍽️ Cleaning their room teaches children how to organize and maintain their personal space, which is an important skill to have as they grow older and move out on their own. 🛏️

    By teaching children these skills at a young age, parents are setting them up for success in the future. These skills will not only help them take care of themselves but also be valuable contributors to their communities and workplaces. As parents of children with autism, we have to face the fact we won’t live forever, so we have to help them be as independent as they can be! 🌟

    Build Self-Esteem and Confidence

    Completing chores can be a great confidence booster for children. As they complete tasks, they will feel a sense of accomplishment and pride in their ability to contribute to the household. Jacob is always happy when he’s allowed to order what he likes on Friday, but there have been a few Fridays he was sad because he didn’t have a great week. Be consistent! 😊

    This can be especially powerful for children who may struggle in other areas. By giving them a task they can excel at, parents can help build their self-esteem and confidence, which will benefit them in other areas of their lives. 🌈

    Additionally, completing chores can help children develop a sense of responsibility and reliability. When they consistently complete tasks, they will feel pride in their ability to follow through and meet their commitments. Yes! 🎉

    Chores Teach the Value of Hard Work

    Finally, teaching children chores helps instill the value of hard work. When children are assigned tasks, they learn that they need to work hard and put in the effort to complete them. 💪

    This is an important lesson that will serve them well throughout their lives. Whether in their personal or professional lives, the value of hard work is crucial for success. 🏆

    By teaching children the value of hard work through chores, parents are setting them up for success in the future. They will understand that success comes from effort and dedication and that anything worth having requires hard work and perseverance. 🚀

    How to Introduce Chores to Your Children with Autism

    Introducing chores to children can be a challenge, but it doesn’t have to be. Here are some tips to make the process easier:

    – Start Young: The earlier you start introducing chores, the easier it will be for children to understand their importance. Use a visual schedule—it’s simple and you don’t need to use a lot of language, which your child may not understand.
    – Be Consistent: Make sure that chores are assigned consistently and that children understand the consequences of not completing them. This is KEY!
    – Be Patient: Children may not do the task perfectly at first, but with practice and patience, they will improve. Pick your battles and remember it may not be done to your highest expectations, but it’s a work in progress.
    – Provide Guidance: Be available to provide guidance and assistance when needed. Have a schedule and model without using a lot of language that will overwhelm your child.
    – Make It Fun: Try to make chores as fun as possible by turning them into games or contests. Yes! I have a list of chores and so does Jake—I can always point to mine or his to make it a friendly competition.

    Tips for Making Chores Fun for Children

    Making chores for children with autism fun can help to motivate them to complete tasks. Here are some tips for making chores more enjoyable:

    – Turn Tasks into Games: See who can fold laundry the fastest or who can clean their room the most thoroughly.
    – Use Music: Play music while completing tasks to make them more enjoyable. Check out this post: How my husband changes Jacob’s bad mood with music! #musicandautism.
    – Offer Rewards: Consider offering rewards for completing tasks, such as extra screen time or a special treat.
    – Work Together: To make chores more enjoyable and to teach children the importance of teamwork do your tasks too.

    Common Mistakes to Avoid When Teaching Children with Autism Chores

    When teaching children chores, there are some common mistakes to avoid. Here are a few:

    – Assigning Too Many Tasks: It’s important to assign tasks that are age-appropriate and manageable. Assigning too many tasks can be overwhelming and counterproductive.
    -Providing Guidance: Children with autism may not know how to complete a task properly. Provide modeling and assistance when needed.
    – Not Being Consistent: If chores are not assigned consistently, children may not understand their importance and may not complete them.
    – Not Providing Positive Reinforcement: It’s important to provide positive reinforcement when children complete tasks. This helps to build their confidence and motivation.

    Benefits of Teaching Children with Autism Chores

    Teaching children chores is an important part of raising responsible and independent children. Chores teach responsibility, independence, valuable life skills, and the value of hard work. Additionally, completing chores can help to build self-esteem and confidence in children.

    By introducing chores at a young age, parents can set their children up for success in the future. By being consistent, patient, and providing guidance and positive reinforcement, parents can help to make the process enjoyable.

    click for free guide
    Want more? Click for the link and the free guide!

    Read More

  • How my husband changes Jacob’s bad mood with music! #musicandautism.

    Change the Tune 🎶

    Music and autism, my husband uses music to improve Jacob’s bad mood. When Jacob starts repeating negative or angst-filled movie quotes, music becomes our go-to tool to redirect his focus and uplift his spirits. 🎥➡️🎵

    We’ve discovered that music he gets excited about—whether it’s tunes we enjoy together or soundtracks from his favorite movies—can work wonders. Below are a couple of playlists that Jacob loves when David is DJing. 🎧🎸

    As parents of children with autism, especially those with limited language skills, finding effective ways to manage emotions and behaviors is crucial. The power of music is AMAZING! Last week, I shared how sign language has significantly helped Jacob. This week, I want to show you how music can also be a fantastic way to redirect a bad mood. 🎤

    It’s hard to stay mad when you’re singing or dancing! Whether your child has expressive language delays or simply needs a mood boost, integrating music into your daily routine can create moments of joy and connection. 🌟

    Join me as we explore the magic of music and how it can transform challenging moments into opportunities for fun and engagement. Check out previous posts:How does mindset change things when raising a child with autism? 🧩

    The Challenge of Sarcastic Quotes 🎬

    When Jacob seems to be stuck in a loop of sarcastic movie quotes, he’s intent on making sure everyone knows the mood he’s feeling. He’s not able to just explain himself or what’s going on inside, as he doesn’t have typical conversations. This can make it hard to understand his emotions and thoughts.

    Using Positive Movie Quotes 🎥

    We use movie quotes from happier parts of the story or ones he enjoys saying frequently. I’m pretty good at this, but his dad and brother are much better at movie quotes because they can really do the voices and impersonations well. 🎭

    Activities and Music Therapy For Autism🎸

    Jacob’s dad excels as the house DJ. Being a musician, he intuitively starts playing Jacob’s favorite upbeat songs to shift his mood. Here’s a blog post I found on music therapy: https://www.theautismpage.com/music-and-autism-music-activities-and-music-therapy/  

    Music therapy has real results with the population of children with autism spectrum disorder. Here is another source to see:http://chrome-extension://efaidnbmnnnibpcajpcglclefindmkaj/https://www.musictherapy.org/assets/1/7/MT_Autism_2012.pdf

    Here are some playlists we use:

    Upbeat Songs from Movies and Shows

    • Water Buffalo – Veggie Tales
    • Belly Button – Veggie Tales
    • Pizza Angel – Veggie Tales
    • Larry Boy (Rock On) – Veggie Tales
    • In the Belly of the Whale – Jonah

    Classic Rock Hits

    • Don’t Bring Me Down – ELO
    • Shining Star – Earth, Wind & Fire
    • I Can Help – Billy Swan
    • Somewhere Only We Know – Keane

    Worship and Praise Songs

    • I’m Not Ashamed – Newsboys
    • Take Me To Your Leader – Newsboys
    • Wherever We Go – Newsboys
    • Shine – Newsboys
    • In The Belly Of The Whale – Newsboys

    This doesn’t come naturally to me, but it does for my husband. He plays guitar, and music is his go-to for himself and for Jacob. The rhythm and familiarity of the music work wonders in redirecting Jacob’s mood from negative to positive. Let’s learn how autism and music can work together to increase positive feelings🎶

    #musicandautism
    Music and Autism, change the tune!

    Integrating Music into School 📚

    Seeing how well music works with Jacob, I’ve started using YouTube at school, keeping music in the background. It can be challenging to find playlists with safe lyrics, so I stick with what I know. I don’t have time to vet all modern songs for lyrics, so I choose ones I’m certain are appropriate. 🎧

    Music has a positive impact not just on Jacob but also on my students. It helps them, and me, get through the day with a better mood and more focus.  Music and autism  go together because it engages and can calm a child with autism, so give it a try!

    The Influence of Music on Emotions 🎵

    Music can influence your feelings toward movie characters, enhance drama, fear, and even happiness! At home, we use music to promote happiness or increase stamina for cleaning or working out. It’s a powerful tool for setting the tone and energy of any activity. 🏃‍♂️

    The Mental Health Benefits of Music 🎧💆‍♀️

    Music isn’t just beneficial for children with autism; it’s also a powerful tool for parents. Managing the complexities of raising a child with autism can be stressful and emotionally draining. Integrating music into your daily routine can be a great way to boost your mental health and overall well-being. 🌈

    Increasing Positive Emotions

    Listening to your favorite songs can elevate your mood and increase positive emotions. Whether it’s a song that brings back happy memories or an upbeat tune that gets you moving, music has the power to lift your spirits and bring a smile to your face. 😄

    Decreasing Anxiety and Stress in autistic children

    Music is also effective in decreasing anxiety and stress. Gentle, soothing music can create a calming environment, helping to lower stress levels and promote relaxation. For moments of high stress or when you need a break, playing calming music can be a quick way to reset and find peace. 🧘‍♀️

    Choosing the Right Music

    It’s important to choose music that will lift your mood and change your tune positively. Create playlists that include songs you love, whether they are relaxing instrumentals or energetic tracks. Here are some tips:

    • Mood Boosters: Include songs that make you feel happy and energized.
    • Relaxation Tracks: Add calming instrumentals or nature sounds for moments when you need to de-stress.
    • Sing-Alongs: Include tracks that you can sing along to, as singing itself can be a great mood enhancer.

    Music can be your ally in maintaining a positive mindset, even on challenging days. Embrace it as a tool for self-care and let it help you navigate the ups and downs of parenting. 🎶

    Using Music for Autism Spectrum🎼

    So, use your powers for good and use music to show love, happiness, or excitement. In our house, we also use music in a big way for worship. Jacob loves TobyMac, MercyMe, and many others to sing praise songs. It’s another way we connect and find joy together.🙌 #musicandautism #autismcoach

    Get free Guide!
    Get my free Guide!

    Read More