parenting tips

  • Blog, schedules

    Help! 3 Ways a schedule can help sensory issues and communication barriers? #Autism Challenges🧩

    Ever felt like a detective trying to crack the case of your child’s meltdown? You may need to try sensory-friendly schedules. Welcome to the world’s quirkiest puzzle, where flickering lights, itchy shirts, and vacuum cleaner roars can trigger an emotional rollercoaster. Sensory sensitivities team up with communication barriers, leaving us feeling like we need a superhero cape. 🦸‍♀️🕵️‍♂️

    Example of Jacob's schedule
    Here’s and example of things on Jacob’s schedule.

    Sensory-friendly schedules 📅

    The first superhero of parenting: the schedule! When Jacob’s world feels like it’s spinning out of control, a visual schedule swoops in to save the day. With clear expectations and a roadmap for his day, Jacob finds comfort in the chaos. From school work to chores, the schedule guides him through, offering a sense of security and predictability. And when sensory overload strikes, the schedule becomes a lifeline, helping us navigate the storm before it hits. 🌪️⏰

    Empowering Independence: With a sensory-friendly schedule as their trusty guide, children gain independence and confidence in navigating their world. From choosing sensory-friendly clothes to managing their daily routines, the schedule equips them with the tools they need to thrive despite their challenges.🌟🚧 

    Read more about schedules: How can using schedules can change your child’s life?

    Sensory-Friendly Breaks: Keeping Calm  🧩

     Second in our toolkit of sanity savers, sensory breaks reign supreme. Whether it’s fidgets, sensory bins, or noise-canceling headphones, these magical tools turn meltdowns into moments of calm. Jacob’s favorite? His trusty headphones, shielding him from the dreaded vacuum cleaner roar during cleaning sessions. And when it’s playtime, it’s all about hands-on activities like playdoh, legos, and puzzles, offering a welcome escape from the sensory whirlwind. 🧩🎧

    Sensory Sanctuary: A visual sensory-friendly schedule offers a safe harbor amidst sensory storms, providing structure and predictability in a chaotic world. It guides children like Jacob through their day, offering comfort and security when sensory overload strikes.🆘🕒 

    Need more help with sensory? Read here: Tired and Frustrated Mom! Sensory Challenges for the Autism Spectrum

    Mastering the Clothes Conundrum: A Sensory-Friendly Solution 👕

    How-using-schedules-can-change-your-life2
    Using schedules for Jacob to understand his days changed our lives!

    Ah, the age-old battle of clothes selection! With Jacob’s clothes schedule in hand, we’ve cracked the code to stress-free dressing. Planning ahead ensures we have soft, sensory-friendly schedule options ready for action. Weekdays are all about functionality, while weekends offer a chance for Jacob to flex his fashion muscles and choose his own adventure. It’s a win-win for everyone! 👖👚

    If you need more help with a clothes schedule go to this post: “How to create a personalized schedule for children with autism”

    Breaking Down Communication Barriers: The Schedule’s Secret Weapon 🗣️

    But wait, there’s more! Third, the visual schedule doesn’t just tame sensory storms; it also breaks down communication barriers. When Jacob feels overwhelmed and a meltdown looms large, words become scarce. https://autismclassroomresources.com/visual-schedules/ But with the schedule as our trusty guide, we bridge the gap between chaos and clarity. With each routine task and scheduled activity, Jacob finds his voice again, transforming meltdowns into moments of connection. 🗝️💬

    Communication Catalyst: When emotions run high and words fail, the schedule becomes a lifeline, bridging the gap between chaos and clarity. Routine tasks and scheduled activities empower children to find their voice again, transforming meltdowns into moments of connection, allowing them to have independence.👥🗣️

    schedule-fun-jacob-is-the-hulk-barnes-and-noble
    Jacob having fun at Barnes and Noble after a week of completed work!

    So, fellow parent detectives, when the sensory storms hit and the meltdowns loom large, remember: humor is your secret weapon. With a dash of laughter and a sprinkle of patience, we’ll navigate the quirkiest puzzles together, one meltdown at a time. #AutismChallenges🧩

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  • Blog, schedules

    Autism and the Holidays: Shaping the Season with a Positive Mindset

    autism and holidays, Relax with a date night to kick off the holiday month!
    Date Night! #ZachWilliams

    Ah, the early years of dealing with autism, how to have autism and holidays? The days were a rollercoaster of emotions – anxiety, stress, depression, and yes, let’s not forget the ever-present financial strain from therapies not covered by insurance. But hey, welcome to the world of parenting a child with autism, right? https://www.autismspeaks.org/blog/home-holidays-ways-make-sure-your-autistic-child-enjoys-their-break

    Rolling in the Memories 🎢

    family and christmas time
    Jacob’s dad David and Older brother Nicholas!

    Fast forward a couple of decades, and I’ve not only survived numerous family holidays but also successfully guided my students through adapting to change and finding joy along the way.

    From those early, challenging years to the present day, I’ve learned that having a plan and setting boundaries for myself and my son can turn the holiday season into a time of joy and happiness. I’ve realized that, just like my son, I need structure during this bustling time of year. It’s all about keeping my own days from falling apart, because when they do, well, let’s just say it’s like inviting old pals Anxiety, Stress, and Depression back into my life. And we’re not on speaking terms anymore! Let’s make a plan for autism and holidays. Why these 3 boundaries are desperately needed for my autistic son?

    The Jolly Watchlist 📺

    autism and holidays, Movies we watch in December!
    Movies we watch in December!

    I absolutely adore the holidays, but I’ll be the first to admit that my decorations don’t rival a winter wonderland anymore. My mental bandwidth sometimes resembles a traffic jam, and I don’t always have the time and energy for elaborate decor. But I’m working on it! I do cherish those twinkling lights, and I’m the first one to set up the Christmas tree, queue up the holiday movies, and plan Advent activities to teach Jacob about the birth of Christ.

    Movies like “It’s a Wonderful Life,” “While You Were Sleeping,” “Heat Miser, Snow Miser,” “The Grinch,” and “Home Alone” are like little parcels of joy. They infuse the holiday spirit into our hearts and remind us that this season is about warmth, love, and laughter.

    Set Boundaries, Savor Moments 🎁

    So, what’s the secret to keeping your holiday spirits high? Have a plan, and set boundaries. Not everything that comes your way needs a ‘yes.’ For instance, I’ve learned that taking Jake to bustling, noisy places or disrupting his routine doesn’t bring me joy; it brings stress. So, as much as I’d love to say yes to every invite, I have to prioritize his needs and have a caregiver in place when I can’t be there.

    Don’t feel guilty about your boundaries; embrace them, and savor the moments. Inside, I decorate to create a festive atmosphere, watch heartwarming movies, bake cookies, and sip hot cocoa.

    Self-Care Is the Best Gift 🌟

    I’ve also learned the importance of self-care, not just professional development. I indulge in reading for pleasure, especially action-packed books – a brief escape from the daily challenges of being a boy mom. Long baths are a luxury I occasionally treat myself to. Finding time for exercise is a goal I’m still working on. After a day filled with special needs at home and school, I often suffer from decision fatigue and every other kind of fatigue imaginable. But I’m learning to plan better, particularly for meals and exercise.

    In the end, it’s all about maintaining that positive mindset. With a plan, boundaries, a touch of self-care, and a sprinkle of holiday joy, the holiday season can be a time of joy, even for parents of children with autism. So here’s to embracing where you are and enjoying life, one festive moment at a time! 🎄🧡 #positivemindset How Jacob has success daily without anxiety. #autismchallenges

    Holiday Mindset 🎄
    autism and holidays, Advent activities for Jacob!
    Advent activities for Jacob!

    So, as we dive headfirst into the holiday season, remember, don’t compare your life or your child’s journey to anyone else’s. Celebrate where you are, and how far you’ve come. Life is a unique journey, and no two paths are the same. Keep a journal if it helps; it’s a wonderful way to witness the progress you and your child have made over the years. Here’s a previous blog post if you want more tips: 5 ways to regain my calm when my special needs child is dancing on my last nerve!

    Through all the highs and lows, the challenges, and the laughter, we’re moving forward. We’re blessed with the opportunity to love, learn, and grow with our extraordinary children. 🌟📖💪 #movingforward #blessed

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  • Uncategorized

    Empowering Special Needs Children with Self-Care Skills: Our Inspiring Journey

    Self-Care for Special Needs
    For Jacob pictures in schedules were a game changer!

    Our Story: A Tale of Triumph over Autism’s Language Labyrinth

    Meet Jacob, our fiercely independent son who, thanks to his autism, had a unique way of getting his point across. Instead of words, he’d take us by the hand and lead us to what he wanted. At first, we were told, “Boys develop speech later,” but as time passed, we learned it wasn’t that simple.

    These additional signs, such as being solitary, hand flapping when excited, and specific preferences for clothing and food, were further indications of Jacob’s unique needs and characteristics.

    Early Signs and Diagnosis

    Keep calm!

    Jacob’s first language was independence. He’d approach us when he needed something, but conversation? Not his forte. Ear infections added to the puzzle – after all, it’s hard to talk when you can’t hear. Then, the revelation: autism. Suddenly, language became an intricate maze for our little Jacob.

    Jacob’s speech therapy was eventually approved, but the wait lasted for six long months before a spot opened up. When it finally did, the therapist was exceptional. She recognized things that I had overlooked and strongly suggested that I take Jacob to TEACCH for evaluation and additional insights into why speech was still eluding him.

    Seeking Help and Support

    Our journey to empower Jacob began with an autism diagnosis from a TEACCH psychiatrist (yes, they’re real-life superheroes). They offered priceless advice: join every waiting list, apply for every service, and sift through the options later. It was a waiting game, but oh, the wisdom!

    After much consideration, we decided to accept the services that would involve workers coming to our house and even taking Jacob out into the community. This approach was aimed at helping him generalize skills and become an integrated part of both our family and the community. It was a challenging path, as it took five long years on a waiting list, and there were numerous adjustments for Jake and the entire family. However, the results were incredibly rewarding.

    Working together as a team, we utilized various supports and schedules to aid Jacob in learning and managing his self-care routines. This collective effort empowered him to become more independent over time.

    The Power of Visual Schedules

    Jacob with laundry, dishes and movies when chores are done.
    Chores and movie when complete!

    Now, picture this: I, a non-teacher, tasked with creating boxes of coins and schedules. Initially baffled, I wondered if we were training a tiny bank teller. Yet, I stuck with it. Our home soon resembled a museum of pictures, schedules, and how-to guides. Words were too much for Jacob; he needed visuals to navigate life’s map.

    Following Jacob’s diagnosis, I made a significant life change. I returned to school, left my job, and set out on a new career path: becoming a Special Education teacher. My driving force was the strong desire to not only assist my son but also other mothers who found themselves in a similar situation, feeling clueless about how to support their children.

    During my time in school, while still juggling work commitments, I made the life-altering decision to homeschool Jacob. The details of that adventure are a story for another day, but I can proudly say that it was a success!

    The Transformation
    Smiles_family_fun
    Pic’s of the family over the years during summer!

    And here came the transformation. Our house became a non-verbal wonderland, complete with sign language. Sign language, you say? Wasn’t that a no-no for speech development? Not for us. Sign language became our bridge to speech, a magical catalyst. Jacob began speaking when he saw and used signs, proving that sometimes more communication tools are better.

    Collaboration and Progress

    Navigating the web, we found TEACCH and Do2Learn, our autism knowledge goldmines. Therapists and professionals became our partners, sharing victories and tips to help Jacob progress. Teamwork made the dream work. Need more help with schedules see this previous post:“How To Create A Personalized Schedule For Children With Autism”

    https://educatingjacob.com/blog/page/4/

    In parting, I’ll share a simple yet powerful strategy: visual sequences. For instance, laminating a card with toothbrushing steps, placed by the sink, is a game-changer. Less talk, more action! These strategies not only transform your child’s life but also bring smiles and happiness to the whole family. Here is link for the web site mentioned that will help with the pictures. https://do2learn.com/picturecards/printcards/activities_everyday.htm

    The information on TEACCH is: https://teacch.com/

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  • Uncategorized

    5 ways to regain my calm when my special needs child is dancing on my last nerve!

    Parenting often feels like a circus act, a precarious balancing act while juggling flaming torches. This act becomes even more challenging when you’re raising a special needs child who has an uncanny talent for tap-dancing on your last nerve. But fear not, you’re not alone under the big top of parenthood.

    Finding Humor in the Chaos

    Imagine this: Jacob, my son, is in the throes of an emotional meltdown, and I’m teetering on the brink of my own emotional precipice. His emotions are performing gymnastic feats while I struggle not to stumble over my own emotional shoelaces.

    #parentingtip
    Help them find their calm.

    Time-Out for Both

    While you might want to resort to shouting, I’ve stumbled upon a magical secret. Instead of adding my own vocal fireworks to the spectacle, I calmly send him to his room. And guess where I head? You guessed it—my own. It becomes my sanctuary, a place to contemplate the mysteries of life, such as the curious case of vanishing socks.

    A Magical Secret

    But here’s the remarkable part, folks: once I’ve rediscovered my own sense of calm, I return as the superhero of redirection. Armed with his trusty schedule, I make adjustments like a maestro conducting a symphony of serenity.

    When I return home after being out on errands or work, it’s a transition.

    When I return home from the day’s adventures, Jacob’s radar is on high alert. He emerges from his room, Kindle in hand, armed with a repertoire of movie quotes that could rival Shakespeare. My husband and co-pilot on this rollercoaster ride, informs me that Jacob has been content and industrious in my absence. Yet, of course, he eagerly awaits my attention.

    Instead of plunging into a sea of chores, I dedicate precious moments to indulging Jacob’s cinematic enthusiasm. We trade lines and anecdotes as if we’re strolling down a Hollywood red carpet, not the doorway of our modest abode.

    Children with autism often march to their own drum.
    Children with autism often march to their own drum

    Children with autism often march to their own drum, which can resemble a rock concert when emotions take center stage. This is where a well-structured plan for the day, akin to a symphony score, comes into play. Without it, navigating transitions becomes as challenging as corralling a group of hyperactive squirrels. Need help with schedules see this post: https://educatingjacob.com/how-using-schedules-can-change-your-childs-life/

    Set up for Success

    We need our own toolkits of tranquility. Buckle up as we embark on a journey to discover five ways to regain parental calm amidst the whirlwind of special needs parenting. Trust me; we’ve got this!

    So when your child is dancing on that last nerve, try the following:

    1. The Gratitude Journal Getaway

    Seek solace in your room and wield the written word to restore your peace. Grab your gratitude journal, not just a book, but a portal to a tranquil realm.

    With each pen stroke, you immortalize moments, victories, and triumphs. Chronicle battles conquered, heartaches soothed, and small wins that might vanish amidst the daily chaos.

    These gratitude strokes are your lifeline, offering respite. They’re tangible proof of your resilience, a map guiding you back to your journey’s heart. Amidst the whirlwind, you’ll find you’ve traveled far.

    Take a break
    #takeabreak
    1. The Bath-time Escape

    When the pressure mounts, take refuge in your fortress of relaxation: the bathtub. Sometimes, nothing beats a warm bath, accompanied by red wine and soothing candles. Add a bath bomb, some softly flickering candles, and an audiobook to soak away the stress.

    1. Movie Magic

    Escape into the world of comedy or action. Whether it’s classic romantic comedies like “While You Were Sleeping” or thrilling action-packed Marvel movies, losing yourself in a film can be the perfect distraction. It’s a chance to unwind and recharge.

    #SmallActsOfCalm #SpecialLove
    Sometimes just a hug and redirection will calm strong emotions.
    1. Reading Retreat

    Delve into the world of books. Whether you’re into the page-turning suspense of James Patterson or the humor of Janet Evanovich, a good book can transport you to another realm. For those seeking solace in faith, find strength and comfort in the Psalms and Proverbs.

    make exercise more fun!
    Use exercise to reset and calm. Don’t forget to make it fun!
    1. The Great Escape

    Sometimes, you need a change of scenery. My husband opts for exercise, while I find solace in a trip to the grocery store or sharing tea with my best friend. A brief outing can work wonders, allowing you to return to your child with renewed patience and perspective.

    You can’t take care of others without first taking care of yourself.

    Remember, in the chaos of parenting a special needs child, taking care of yourself is not selfish; it’s essential. These five escapes can help you regain your calm, ensuring you have the emotional reserves to support your child effectively.

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